


The Hurt's Set In

by Port_in_a_Storm



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Childhood Sexual Abuse, Father/Son Incest, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Past Sexual Abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-07
Updated: 2016-01-07
Packaged: 2018-05-12 11:38:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,061
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5664727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Port_in_a_Storm/pseuds/Port_in_a_Storm
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Aaron confides in Robert about his childhood, revealing his dark and anguished past. Robert does his best to comfort him. PLEASE HEED THE WARNINGS; THERE IS NOTHING DREADFULLY EXPLICIT, BUT IT IS MORE THAN IMPLIED. PLEASE READ THE BEGINNING NOTES. I'VE RATED THIS 'M' BECAUSE OF THE NATURE OF THE CONTENT, NOT NECESSARILY THE CONTENT ITSELF.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Hurt's Set In

**Author's Note:**

> I am really urging you to heed the warnings on this one, guys. If there is anyone who is dreadfully uncomfortable with this fic being on here, please let me know and I will remove it. There is nothing too explicit mentioned, but it is definitely more than implied. I've given this a 'Mature' rating because of the nature of the content, not necessarily the content itself. The majority of the fic is dedicated to Robert's reaction, and how he comforts Aaron (if you want to see it as a sequel to 'The Lost and the Lonely', feel free.
> 
> Again, I am warning about the incestuous sexual abuse of a minor at the beginning of this fic. It is the first two paragraphs, if you want to skip that; if you want to go straight to Robert's reaction, skip to at least paragraph three. I am not writing this fic to offend anyone, and I sincerely hope no one sees it as glorifying what could be a terrible and traumatic storyline, but this was written mainly for me to portray what I hope Robert's reaction will be. Nothing of this SL is actually clarified in Emmerdale, this is purely what I've garnered from what has been happening recently, and through Aaron's reactions to Gordon's return.
> 
> Sorry for the overkill on notes, but I just really want to make sure that no one walks into this with any amount of uncertainty about what it contains. Again, if anyone wants me to remove this because of its content, I will more than understand.
> 
> That being said, please proceed with caution.

Aaron just could not hide his anguish anymore, and that night, with Robert in his room with him, everything came out. ‘It started years ago,' Aaron said. 'I was twelve. I heard them downstairs, Gordon and Sandra, arguin’. They argued a lot, back then. He was slurring, drunk as anythin’. I didn’t really think much of it. I must have fallen asleep at some point, cos the next thing I knew, he was there, in my room. He knew that I'd seen him. But he... he stuck his hand under the cover and....’ His voice trembled and he inhaled sharply. Robert shook his head, as if he couldn’t comprehend the words which were coming out of Aaron’s mouth.

‘I tried to fight him off, but he was just too strong, and I was so scared.’ Aaron wiped the tears away, but they just kept coming, falling from his eyes like a waterfall. ‘I learned to dread every time he got drunk and they argued, cos I knew without a doubt that he’d come into my room at night.’ Aaron stopped for a moment, looked down at his hands and shook his head. He was shaking. Robert wanted nothing more than to reach out and put his arms around him, but he was frozen; too afraid that Aaron would push him away, or shatter in his arms. He didn’t know which was worse.

‘I turned my anger on her; on Sandra,’ he continued. He sounded angry. His jaw was clenched, like the words were being wrenched out of him. ‘I just thought “why can’t you make him happy? Why can’t you stop him getting drunk?” Cos if she did, then he wouldn't…’ He stopped and glanced at Robert for a second, but had to look away again. ‘I’m messed up, Robert. I’ve been messed up for years.’

Robert swallowed an awful dryness in his throat, forcing himself to speak, to offer some words of comfort. ‘You listen to me,’ he said finally, his voice breaking in sorrow. ‘This – this does not define you. Do you understand me? That was not everything you are.’

Aaron shook his head. ‘It’s destroying me from the inside out. How am I supposed to think anything else?’

Robert put a hesitant hand on Aaron’s arm and was relieved when he wasn’t pushed away. ‘Don’t let it destroy you, Aaron.’ He shook his head. ‘I – I don’t know what to say. “Sorry” doesn’t really cut it. I feel like I want to go down there right now and beat him to a pulp.’ He had to stop and retract his anger when Aaron shook his head. ‘But that wouldn’t change anything. But, Aaron, doing… doing THIS to yourself… that’s not gonna change anything either.’

‘It helps.’

‘How?’

‘It – I don’t know, Robert! It just does!’

‘And nothing I say can change that?’ He bit his lip when Aaron shook his head. ‘Then I’ll tell Chas. Or Paddy.’

‘No! You can’t!’ Aaron exclaimed, suddenly panicking. ‘They’re dealing with enough as it is.’ He looked Robert in the eye, determination and sorrow making a dangerous cocktail. 'You can’t tell them.’

‘Fine. But you need to promise to talk to me.’ When Aaron shook his head again, Robert grabbed his chin, pulling the younger man’s face around to look at him properly. ‘I’m serious, Aaron! You can’t keep something like this bottled up. Either you talk to them, or you talk to me.’

Tears ran down Aaron’s face and into his beard. Robert had to resist the urge to kiss them away, not because he didn’t know where he stood with Aaron right now, but because he didn’t want his former lover to think he was taking advantage of him. 

‘I want to be there for you, Aaron,’ he said quietly. ‘Please. Let me help you.’ It didn’t escape his notice that Aaron’s brilliant blue eyes were on his lips, but for once, Robert didn’t act on it. Finally, Aaron nodded, and Robert breathed a sigh of relief. ‘And the cutting and the burning,’ Robert said timidly. ‘You’ll stop?’

Aaron shrugged. ‘I’ll try.’

‘That’s all I’m asking.’

He got up to leave, but Aaron grabbed his wrist. ‘Don’t – don’t leave?’ He looked away, then back. Robert could see it was a struggle for Aaron to meet his eyes. ‘I don’t want to be alone.’

Robert closed his eyes, wishing for strength: he didn’t know how he was going to resist such a request, but to stay in Aaron’s room, where they had made love? Yet one look at the anguish so clear on Aaron’s face and he knew he could never deny him this. ‘Okay. I’ll grab a blanket from your wardrobe and sleep on the ground.’

By the time he had retrieved a blanket and taken off his belt and shoes, Aaron was lying on the bed, facing the wall, away from Robert. He lay down on the ground, wincing as it played a bit of havoc on his back. Eventually, he settled. 

They were both quiet for such a long time, that Robert thought Aaron had gone to sleep, but moments later, just as his own eyes started to close, he heard the sheets rustle. ‘Do… does this change anything?’ Aaron’s voice was a whisper in the dark.

Robert frowned. ‘Does what change what?’

Aaron was silent, but Robert could feel the pain rolling off him like smoke. ‘What I – what I just told you. Do you… think less of me?’

Robert sat up. ‘What? How could you think that?’

He saw the duvet move as Aaron shrugged. 

Robert got to his feet and budged Aaron over gently in the bed. Aaron moved willingly, and turned onto his back to look at Robert. ‘Aaron, what you told me does not change anything. Okay? I don’t love you any less or any more than I ever did.’

Aaron’s breath caught in his throat, but he nodded, if with a bit of uncertainty. 

Robert slid down on the bed until his head was resting on the pillow next to Aaron’s. ‘I swear, Aaron. Nothing has changed.’ He held his arm out. ‘C’mere.’ Aaron moved under his arm after only a second of hesitancy, and Robert pulled him in close, so that Aaron’s head was resting on his chest. Robert counted Aaron’s breaths until they evened out into a deep sleep. Forty-three.

**Author's Note:**

> Pay me a visit on tumblr: [Port In A Storm](http://portinastorm.tumblr.com/)


End file.
